Archive of ‘Maximus’ category

How to Bathe a Dog: Dog’s Perspective

Buddy hates baths almost as much as small children and other dogs. He’s not a social¬†dog, let’s just put it that way. The night we took him home from the shelter, I tried to bathe him in the bathtub and then blow dry him with my hair dryer. (Bad idea.)

It took him months to go back in that bathroom.

Anyway. This is Buddy’s perspective on how to be bathed.


1. Run from your owner as soon as you see them pulling towels out. RUN. Do not, I repeat, DO NOT fall for the lure of treats. This is crucial. If you succeed in this step, you can skip all of the following.


2. So you fell for the treats, huh? I did, too. Try to shake and shiver as obviously as possible so that your owner knows you are unhappy with the situation.


3. Don’t be too obvious about slurping the water from the spray-machine. Your owner will suspect you’re enjoying your bath.


4. The misery is finally over. As soon as you get out of the sink, shake water on your owner to let them know you’re unhappy. This is an important step. The more water you can get on them, the less baths you’ll get.

5. Accept their peace offering of treats.

6. Optional step: run around the house in circles until your head is spinning.

7. Curl up in a blanket and only shiver when someone approaches you.


Does your dog like getting baths? Hate them? Let me know in the comments below!
xoxo Mrs. Herd